What If Stalin Meant, “I love you. You love me. We’re a happy family”…?

by elizabethfcoates

Dear Salmons,

“I believe in one thing only, the power of human will.”

“Oh boy! Just look at all the good things to eat. I think it would take a dinosaur to eat all of that.”

Granted, they have their differences. Barney is more likely to hug you, as opposed to killing you softly, throwing your body to the piles of millions, dismissing the piles as “statistics”.

But, ultimately, the two characters are just so; they are largely pieces of folk fiction. Whilst Barney is intentional fiction, being a character carefully produced to appeal to children and their grateful parents, Stalin is unintentional fiction, being a character carefully produced to appeal to adults and their dumbstruck children.

Put the two together in your head. Stalin was considered to be the Father of the Soviet Union, treated with as much benevolence as Kim-Jong Un is in North Korea today. Barney the Dinosaur was considered to be a father figure of sorts, treated with similar levels of benevolence by his child minions.

The fact is, they both impressed fantasy versions of themselves upon their audiences, and are seen as safe figures for children.




Show me the difference, salmons. When he sent people to the Gulags, he was screeching the Barney the Dinosaur lyrics at the children of the Soviet Union through schools, sports clubs, anywhere he could possibly reach. After all, he has said;

“Education is a weapon whose effects depend on who holds it in his hands and at whom it is aimed.”

Compared to Barney’s singing of Yankee Doodle, inserting instead “Barney is a dinosaur” and we can see there are at least two characters here who like some self-insertion…

Keep swimming, Salmons.